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Documenting not dying since October 2013.

The 10th & 11th; I am too weak to pull up a pair of jeans.

The 10th & 11th; I am too weak to pull up a pair of jeans.

 The 10th of October.

Hello. It's been a long time since I've written anything; the most I have scribbled for weeks has been keeping a list of my drinks for the kidney doctors.

Today has been my first full day back at home. I slept in my own bed, having shuffled up the stairs on my bum last night, and I discovered that getting up was really difficult because my back is absolutely shot. I had not realised how painful it would be to get out of bed. Came downstairs on my bum too.

To be honest, I think for a while, this will be a blog of tv I have watched and crochet I have done. I have been to the bathroom and to the kitchen to do the milk for my coffee. Otherwise, I have worked on one of my baby blankets because that was nice and easy to get back into, and I watched some TOWIE, Roast Battle, and The Truth About The Harry Quebert Affair. Alison came over to see me which was kind of her, after she sent Jonathan with flowers yesterday. She's very busy. I will move again to go to the dinner table. I discovered last night that I can't pull my own chair in, I am that weak. I'm going to have to ring the gym and see if I can stop paying for a while because I'm not going anywhere near there for some time.

The 11th of October.

I had forgotten how cold it is to be this thin. I got on the scales yesterday and it was a number I used to aspire to when I was deep in the throes of anorexia. Now I just need thermals and jogging bottoms, because I am too weak to pull up a pair of jeans. I had kept a pair of "thin jeans" without thinking I'd ever need them again, and now they fit my legs, but I can't do them up because physically don't have the core to pull them up and my back hurts too much to do them up lying flat.

I started my day off with some exciting news from Anthony Nolan, but I don't think I can say what it is until it's been officially announced, but I now have something to get better for.

Had to go back to hospital today for a blood test, but that did not take long. Went to up 727 where a nurse took some blood and told me I have an appointment to see James on Monday. Jolly good. Keep blood happy until then.

This afternoon, I finished off my blanket, then I covered myself in another one because I was freezing, watched the new Riverdale (what the actual fuck), and started on something I planned on making before I got ill. I also got some flowers from Cats Protection, and some macarons and other flowers from Richard and Joanne next door, bless them! Our living room is overflowing.

The 12th & 13th; I just wasn't there, mentally.

The 12th & 13th; I just wasn't there, mentally.

My miraculous recovery.

My miraculous recovery.