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Documenting not dying since October 2013.

The 4th & 5th; Wembley X Factor day!

The 4th & 5th; Wembley X Factor day!


The 4th of August.

Wembley X Factor day! A pretty magnificent day, all in all. We set off at half ten, driving until we got to some services at about twelve for coffee and some lunch, then drove the rest of the way to Wembley which was rather uneventful.

Parking was a bit of fun but we found the spot we'd booked, then we had to find our way to the erna. The signage from the car park is not good. We found the door for the priority queue and Roxane came out to give us our wristbands, then we got taken through the backstage route to our seats which were awesome. Front row, to the left of the judges, not directly behind them.

Before everyone came in, we had photos in the judges chairs and I had one on the stage. It's very big. The warm up guy Roycey is very good - I'm sure I've seen him at BGT. He was trying to set up this 23 year old guy with a girlfriend, but all the girls he kept bringing up were 17 which was not good, so then he saw Mommy and dragged her up! I couldn't watch but she returned swiftly. Roycey also read out my Twitter so I got a bunch of new followers which was excellent! Simon was running late, so the first few hours were with just Cheryl, Louis and Mel B with a little bobble-head Simon. In between the acts, I got to quickly go and meet them and have photos! Cheryl is tiny, and her face was so shimmery. She held my hands and said "I hope you tick everythin' off your fuckin' list" and it was all kind of a blur but they're all lovely and I was kind of elated.

I don't think I can say much about the acts, so I will just give you the nicknames we gave them: orange guitar girl, short hair nervous girl, girl who lost 11 1/2 stone, camp Geordie, 17 year old boy, Don't Speak woman, Woman group, two sister group, three grubby guys, awful icona pop duo, Arctic Monkeys guy, Kane urban rock, Human Nature boy, falsetto soul guy, pull up jeans guy, boobs Cheryl, Abi, rucksack girl, solo guy, unprepared water boy, little irritating Irish blonde, Italian dog shirt chap, bad throat hoop earrings girl, poisoned guy, Chloe Jasmine, angry girl. We basically had two shows - the first few hours without Simon, then we had a break and Mel left to go to New York, and a load of girls descended upon me to crowd around the table and scream and be in the vicinity of the judges' table it seemed. It was very hot and I really couldn't see what they wanted to achieve by being there but whatever. I was glad when Simon arrived and they all clambered back to their seats and I could breathe again. I met him very briefly - he had no idea who I was, but he was very polite, and we'd just had a very weird audition so we talked about that. I was mesmerised by his teeth - they are so regular. Clearly not real but impeccable. He looks a bit like a teddy bear up close. I really wanted to touch his face but thought it probably wasn't a good idea.

We didn't finish until about twenty past eight, way later than we thought! We were escorted out again so we avoided the masses and got out of the car park. It was really interesting to be there and see the difference in opinions between the audience/judges. I'm also excited to see what Twitter thinks of them all! It's going to be very interesting.

We stopped at the services for food and toilet, then drove straight home. The bruising on my face has bloomed and it's so puffy.

The 5th of August.

My face is just ridiculous. It's very pretty colours, all different shades of purple and I look like a butterfly, but it's so puffy, I can barely keep my eyes open. It doesn't really hurt though, thankfully.

Today was busy! I slept until about four, which is just average, then became gripped by fear as my tummy started hurting and I was cold, so I took my temperature but it was fine - I have never been so happy to see 35.8 degrees. I took some deflatine and gaviscon and lots of deep breaths, and eventually the pain went away. It was terrifying though - I really thought I was going to be going back to hospital in my pyjamas. We had the chiro at ten, and after my fall, Trine found plenty of places to crunch! So I feel a bit looser which is nice. I didn't have to adjust my face too much when lying on my front. We went into Sutton afterwards to get some aloe vera cream for my arms, as the gel just dried me out, and we picked up Lauren, bought some soup and came home to eat that and and chat about X Factor! So that was all lots of fun, and she went to see her grandad and I went to the hygienist and dentist. I had a bit of plaque that's been really annoying and I couldn't get it off, but the hygienist has and it's gone and it feels so good. The new dentist used to be a maxillo-facial doctor so he asked me loads of questions about my fall, basically concerned that I might have had a concussion but I sufficiently reassured him that I was okay. And Clair the receptionist has signed up to be a bone marrow donor because of me.

This evening I am just puffy and tired. It is hard to keep my eyes open and I need rest.

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The 6th & 7th; "This is worst I can remember feeling without infection and as hard as I am trying to stay cheerful, every so often I really do just lose the will to live and I cannot carry on like this."

The 6th & 7th; "This is worst I can remember feeling without infection and as hard as I am trying to stay cheerful, every so often I really do just lose the will to live and I cannot carry on like this."

The 2nd & 3rd; Today turned out rather more eventful than expected!

The 2nd & 3rd; Today turned out rather more eventful than expected!